Monthly Archives: May 2016

Rugzilla Rises (and other things that make me sad)

This is the love light coming from the lamp to cause the reviewer to love it even more after eight years.

This is the love light, the iridescence of joy, coming from the lamp, causing the reviewer to love it even more after eight years of ownership.

The cure for disappointment —or any sad mishap —is to buy a new lamp! Well, not exactly a lamp. I’m using that as a metaphor.

This realization came to me a few days ago when I accidentally chipped the edge of the frosted, cream-colored glass shade on my French antique banker’s lamp. It’s a lovely reproduction and I love the lamp. So, the broken glass shade made me sad. I looked online for a replacement glass shade and couldn’t find one exactly like mine. I found ones that would work, but they weren’t like the one I had.

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Peacocks and Pancakes

We were seated outside of civilization.

We were seated outside of civilization.

“Oh, hello, yoo hoo…” (think: fingers tapping impatiently) “We’re over here and we’re hungry!”

It’s well after 9 p.m. Quite a while ago the IHop hostess seated my friends and me in a lonely corner booth. When we first entered the restaurant, we noticed a packed house, tables full of families clinking coffee cups and chowing down on pancakes adorned in mountains of luscious whipped cream. The hostess marched our party of four past these happy tables where adults chatted and children hooted. She led us to the back room, crammed with vacant tables. Perhaps, I thought, a server assigned to this section needed some business and the hostess decided to help out by seating us in the back room. I didn’t realize IHop would need to hire someone off the street before we would get service. Hours passed, then weeks, and not one server approached our table. Perhaps I exaggerate the length of time we waited. But how long does it take for someone to acknowledge us and take our order?

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If I Could Change The World

Walk? (yawn)

Walk? (yawn)

1.       Traffic lights at pedestrian crosswalks. They flash “walk” or “don’t walk.” But I’d like to have mystery traffic lights that surprise us? How about “run” and “don’t run”? This gets the heartbeat up and good for our health. I mentioned this suggestion to Jerry and he said, “If people run, they have a better chance of tripping or darting out in front of a car, so walking is better.” But is it? We can look both ways and make a note not to trip no matter what the sign commands. How about a “Hootchie Cootchie” and “Don’t Hootchie Cootchie” traffic light? Pedestrians would cross the road while shaking their shoulders and hips. The traffic lights could have speakers as Creedence Clearwater belts out: “Big wheel keep on turnin’, Proud Mary keep on burnin’
Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’ on the river
Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’ on the river.”

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